Licking Wounds: 20 Things On Tuesday

Licking Wounds: 20 Things On Tuesday: This Weeks Topic My Favorite Tweets of the Day! Lets Get Going Shall We... 1. Making a thousand friends is not a miracle. A miracle is makin...

Love

Is a many splendid thing

Fear

My radio spazzed out on the way to work this morning it kept switching stations achey breakey heart (the spanish version) christian rock..Stevie Nicks and if I'm not mistaken that was Jim Jones talking in between. This resulted in a long thought process revolving around the theories of white noise and if those voices they pick up on Ghost Hunters that say EVIL and answer yes and no questions and blame each other have any merit...and then there is space..and people that wack their head and all of the sudden start speaking in tongues and other languages especially old forms of linguistics out of nowhere..residue from past existence it has to be. Maybe I should conjure up some kind of disclaimer..if I did it would start something like this..I have a scar under my eye from a dermal pierce that rejected last year..I wear a retainer..and a stretch mark here and there..and I speak in accents from places I have never lived nor have ever been too constantly and not because I try to..I don't understand it myself..that's enough of that I'll let you draw your own conclusions..

"We will all laugh at Gilded Butterflies"

W.S.

Out of the Blue & Into the Black

I may be numberless, I may be innocent
I may know many things, I may be ignorant
Or I could ride with kings and conquer many lands
Or win this world at cards and let it slip my hands
I could be cannon food, destroyed a thousand times
Reborn as fortune's child to judge another's crimes
Or wear this pilgrim's cloak, or be a common thief
I've kept this single faith, I have but one belief

I still love you
I still want you
A thousand times the mysteries unfold themselves
Like galaxies in my head
On and on the mysteries unwind themselves
Eternities still unsaid
'Til you love me

- Sting A Thousand Years

Just Breathe

After the day I had at school I didn't know whether to burn my computer or my bra...it was that bad..not being one to complain I realize that I could not exist every day in my A game but still...Alas the panic subsided and I found myself home again trying to scoop up the motivation to get in the kitchen and make dinner..while looking for said motivation I began to fantasize about the days when the only person I had to look after was me, myself, and I..Heck I could survive off of potato chips alone and would gladly if I was flying solo..But then I can back to earth and knocked out an Italian dinner made worthwhile by my little man who turned to me with the most serious yet sympathetic look on his face and said "Mama you make the best meatballs in the whole world"..It really is the simple moments like these isn't it though...My teenager is home tonight..now that he has his car and his first job this seems like a rare occasion ..just having him here it feels like everything is right in the world..

Your vision will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.
Carl Jung

I Have a Dirty Little Secret..

I haven't slept good in weeks. I can be exhausted yet as soon as my head hits the pillow I toss and turn for what seems like eternity. I hate mornings anymore might I add. It wasn't always this way in fact I used to love waking up early to cheerfully "greet the day". Now I can't muster up enough energy to get out of bed and do a yoga routine, let alone do much of anything besides get ready, get the kids ready, and make breakfast on the fly (something I can now manage to do within 30 min, think drill sergent). There are two distinct possibilities as to why this may be occurring. Either I have too much on my mind (isn't that always the case) and aside from there being something in the water, it could possibly have to do with something so simple as I changed my drink. It is all my faithful barista Jen's fault, yes I am afraid I am going to have to blame her for this one and avoid accountability. You see it went down something like this when I went in for my regular old Trenta iced coffee with soy and three Splendas...

Jen: You wanna try something really good??

Me: Sure (this could potentialy be the highlight of my day)

Jen: I am going to add a few syrups I think you'll really like..

Me: Ummm Okay..( U mean like sugar syrups..shut up just go with it be polite..)

Jen: Here try this it's iced coffee with Soy Vanilla syrup & Carmel drizzle..

Me: No Splendas..??

Jen: Nope

Me: Oh this is goooood I mean really good ( I want to drizzle caramel all over everything I consume from now on)

Jen: I knew you'd like it..

And so it goes..I have been sucking down two of these per day because they go down so smoooth and getting gooey Carmel up the straw is like a little present all throughout the day.. Oh the shame!! My loving husband brought me home my old soy Splenda standby this weekend as it was too complicated to remember my new concoction and I shunned it, it sat there getting all melty as I sadly tried to nurse it..It just wasn't the same ..how did I ever drink this I thought...Yes I am in trouble and I may not be sleeping well anytime soon and sometimes I can't feel the left side of my face but on a good note I graduated to Gold status on my card and am earning free drinks..I am starting to wonder if they put something in their coffee, you know like how everyone thought cigarettes were safe and then well found out they were addictive and kill people?

Either way...mornings are overrated anyways..

Chillaxin

Is the weekend really almost over? I know it has been said a zillion times but boy how time flies when your having fun. I wouldn't call the majority of the day spent on homework fun mind you but there is a certain mode that I fall into, just on Sundays that makes no matter what I am into feel low key. I am thinking ahead to April and of what the new month will bring. April marks the last month of tolerable weather before the dog days of Summer kick in around these parts and we will be taking full advantage of the outdoors ...a camping trip is in it's planning stage...Sunday involved a little man who insisted on a dozen red roses for his mama. A trip around town with my favorite teenager and his friends..breakfast for dinner today ( I am not a big breakfast in the morning person..like at all) and aside from all the homework a little glam rock, restorative yoga and a sparkly too tight shirt that left me wondering why the hell I left the house like this... here's to the week ahead..

Roses from my little man!

Tickleback

I may be 38 years old but I just want someone to play tickle back with damn it, is that too much to ask for? I am cleansing these next two weeks which means I am eating next to nothing..somewhere between 300 to 500 calories per day. I put myself through this self induced hell usually twice per year. Last year I did an intensive detoxification under the assistance of a naturopathic physician which involved several shots, a strictly vegan diet and 8 weeks of flax smoothies and fruit, lots and lots of fruit. However gruelling it may have seemed I emerged from it my eyes brighter my skin more supple and my hair and nails looking better than they ever have..At the time I needed the intense detoxification however, after I quit drinking it was was imperative I remove the aftereffects and rinse the liver so to say. I have done other cleanses in the past, in particular the traditional Master Cleanse which I highly recommend. This time around I am switching things up a bit and doing an Acai berry cleanse. 4 days in and I feel wonderful..Cleansing is one of the oldest forms of treatment and healing for the body, particularly in Eastern religions as is fasting. It marks a season of renewal inside and out and is done for spiritual reasons in many places throughout the world to this day. It has become popular here in our Western society as a method for weight loss. I like to think that by doing so it compliments my health and well being.
Toxins aren't the only thing I am getting rid of this weekend, the garage is almost..almost cleared out. I sold more rouge furniture today, letting go of those chairs I have been hanging on to in hopes of one day reupholstering them (who was I kidding). Replacing bedroom furniture in one room meant it was out with the old. Replacing the kitchen set with something more sleek and fitting..Feeling liberated I headed off to a thrift sale today only to return with an armful of more books, as if 5 bookcases and growing isn't enough the only solution to this problem is that I need a library, then I won't feel compelled to get rid of any when space gets tighter. Novel idea...
I am going to spend the rest of the weekend reading said books, making meatballs, teaching my little man, taking a long walk and of course sleeping in tomorrow..ahhhh Sundays..I think brunch is already calling my name.

You can also find me.....

For the Love of Coffee

You know whats inspirational? This cup of coffee sitting next to me...

I thought it only right that I share with you my recipe for what I have deemed the

"Perfect Cup of Coffee"

this coming from someone who is a self proclaimed Starbucks addict, If it's not better I'd say it's damn close!

You can start with your favorite roast but I really think freshly ground beans are where it's at, if you only have Folgers that will do too...

Lately I like to use a coffee press or a percolator but whatever your fancy while your brewing grab a saucepan and let the magic happen!

I like to use Silk Vanilla Soy Milk but regular milk would be divine! I pour about 2 cups then add to it (however much feels right) the following cast of characters:

Real Vanilla Extract

Good Quality Cinnamon

Ancho Chile Powder (a little more if there is a stuffy nose that must be dealt with)

Fine Sugar

Cocoa Powder

After simmering on low and stirring all the while add to a cup of freshly brewed coffee and enjoy preferably on the patio listening to your favorite music..

There you have it, my perfect cup of coffee..and by the way since when was Guns & Roses considered Classic Rock? Man this makes me feel old!

This is what I am brewing lately and by all means it trumps anything you can find in the grocery store! Where did I get might you ask??

Why Lot18 of course!

If you haven't had a chance to browse Lot18 it is THE place if your a wine lover, but also if you have a passion for chocolate and coffee, the good stuff! Even better if you sign up you can get up to a $20 credit towards your first purchase so you can try something for next to nothing, and you can earn credit by referring your friends how cool is that.....

Free Dark Chocolate Anyone?? It's okay go on and indulge, I won't tell anyone...

Spring Fever

Yoko Ono hand picked 20 SONGS FOR SPRING  that are sure to get you in the mood for these breezy semi warm days..lately on my play list is a little Sting..Crystal Castles..and throwback 80's tunes..the doors and windows are all kept open this time of year so heres hoping the neighbors like my choice in music..thus far no critters have made it in the house..I was reminded that it is indeed snake season around here as I was hiking my way through the Fountain Hills Botanical Garden today but we didn't let that stop us..Living in the desert you always here tall tales of encounters with rattle snakes, funny because the only time I have ever seen one up close was while vacationing in Long Pine. Nebraska of all places... Not only did I encounter a rattler on that trip, but while tubing down the river noticed the water was full of snakes too..guess that wasn't fish tickling my toes..yikes! One of my favorite posts via social media ever was a girl I know who exclaimed "Now Taking Applications For A Spring Fling!" Gotta love it..It has been a relaxing Spring Break so far..It is very nice to wake up whenever I feel like it which is usually somewhere between 8 and 9..instead of jumping to it and getting everyone ready we linger in bed with books for a good hour until fully awake then go about doing whatever feels right for the day..We have gone vintage shopping and got a few projects in the works..I have been spending an hour or so working on the yard every day which is really meditative and aside from the thorns and prickers still in my finger tips I am getting some good sun, just enough for color.We have taken to going out for lunch and I am indulging in freshly bakes bagels with lucious cream cheese and amazing lox..topped with juicy tomatoes, capers and thinly sliuced red onion..yea I think I have to go back to DJ's tomorrow.. I am back in the kitchen and hiding veggies and healthy stuff in everything I make for my husband..he really has no idea which is great. Tonight I stuffed bell peppers with basmati rice, cuban black beans and ground tukey. I added plenty of minced onions, cumin, ancho chilli powder and garlic so he wouldn't  notice we weren't having "red" meat..cleverly disguised by lots of gooey melted cheddar and Newmans Own tomtato sauce..yes I used jar sauce but so far I cannot master a sauce as pleasent as Newmans Sockaroni..it's perfect. We had a big salad and rosemary garlic bread from La Brea bakery..to me this was the perfect meal on a balmy night like tonight and he didn't notice a thing..tomorrow Nicholas and I will get fresh made tortillas to eat up the leftover stuffing for the peppers mixed with eggs and cheese...We have loads of books this week to read and I have been immersed in reading about chakra balancing..family dinners and my old fav author Sarah Ban Breathenach.. I also got Howard Gardner's Truth, Beauty, and Goodness Reframed, Educating for the Virtues in the Twenty-First Century..Not sure what to think about this one yet...That being said Easter decorations are up and I have began contemplating what we will be on the menu..There is a certain calmness in the house and days before the Spring Equinox I think I am finally embracing the season upon us...

3-4-2K12

We Loved This Movie!!! No Matter What Your Age See It, It's A Must!

The Flu

Nothing will be right in my world till I feel better. Thinking I had the energy I left the house for a bit today and found out pretty quick that the feeling was fleeting and back to the couch I went. It is a nice feeling to be somewhat waited on however, but the fact that my 5 year old has completely destroyed his room in my absence has me filled with dread. Tomorrow we are supposed to go and see the Dr. Suess movie Lorax. Jake has loved Lorax for a few years now and he sleeps with him every night. It is one of our favorite reads so sick or not I will pull it together. Aside from that the thought of Spring break has me anticipating the week ahead coming to an end. 7 days of doing nothing other than working on my tan, sleeping in and watching movies sounds pretty nice about now and believe you me I will be relishing in it. There is still plenty to do around the house as well so yes some chores will have to work there way into the itinerary. Who doesn't love perusing through Pintrest and getting a glimpse into other peoples homes and all the how too's. Who knew all the neat things you can make with those pallets you find behind the grocery stores. it's amazing. One of these days I will set about looking through all of the things I have on my board and actually making something..one of these days. For now I am just going to find my bed, dream a little dream in my feverish state and disappear among the pillows. My 5 year old will probably find his way in there too, which is fine by me as the sound of him breathing as we fall asleep is music to my ears. The lullaby that puts me to sleep every night...

Hiatus

Here I have found myself on the first day of March with a fever. I cannot remember the last time I experienced this achy funky feeling and for that I am thankful, yet when your body temperature rises sometimes everything starts to look pretty surreal. I suppose I will just go with it and embrace it as there is not much choice in the matter for me this evening. In a way it is somewhat nice to be still for a change. It's not like I have been starving for alone time but my mind is usually caught up in trying to just process everything around me lately. I have mulled this over  while driving around this week and have reminded myself time and time again to just take my time on the road and relax a bit. Inevitably I find myself weaving in and out of traffic yet again on a mad dash to get somewhere on time, usually school. I always arrive ahead of schedule yet cannot help but to rush. This has been my work in progress, slowing down.
Today has been somewhat odd. I choked for the first time in my life. Eating dinner apparently I did not chew my food enough and I literally had something blocking my throat that would not go down or out and I could not breath. For those 5 long minutes a lot of thoughts went through my head from of course I have to be alone while this is happening to am I really going out like this? Thank god I didn't meet  the same fate as Mama Cass and someone was watching over me, thank god. Not too long after I whacked my head cleaning up Ninjas pretty hard on the newly installed shelf and decided I needed to sit down. As if cleaning up vomit twice today (one in the truck, once on me) and two sick fighting boys hopped up on Predisone wasn't enough...
So here it is March is upon us..the first two months of the year I have been regrouping and buried in 5 classes this semester, but that's commonplace anymore. I have gotten rid of half of my possessions and that in and of itself has been liberating and the new home is starting to feel like home as things become more settled and organized. This is my anniversary month where we will celebrate one year of marriage. Ahhhh marriage is a funny thing you know, the reality of marriage vs. the fantasy of it that many of us hold onto in our youth.My best friend who happens to be 68 years old (and who by all means has it all going for her) and I were laughing the other day over coffee at the mere thought that people can stay married for 25 years. I think things like this just sort of happen if your lucky. So far so good but I already spent 10 years of my life married, I will just be happy if I can add up the two consecutively. I learned long ago that with expectations comes disappointment so I try not to hold onto many of them.
So whats on the menu for March? I for one would like to be able to give up white sugar. I have been trying to do this for some time now to no avail..but hey its good to have dreams..

Escapism

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly, and listen to others; even the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself to others you may become ...vain and bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

...

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your career however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of times. Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself, especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the council of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture the strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars: you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should!

Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you perceive Him to be; and whatever your labours and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace with your soul. With all its shams, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world.

Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

Desiderata
Max Ehrmann, 1927

Pinapple Upside Down Cake & David Bowie

Happy New Year..I know I am a little late getting out the gate but the past few weeks have been an readjustment period of sorts. With that came a new home and all the plagues and pleasures that go along with it. I do enjoy however the space around me and the peace and quiet that was impossible to achieve in my retro townhouse. Classes have been reconfigured and I have been focusing my attention on making a home for us here in all its beauty, imperfections and solitude.My husband has been out of town and I am spending yet another night chickin out as I like to call it. Tonight it has involved baking a cake and listening to the Pandora which has been stuck on Art music circa 1980's for the better part of 4 days now, maybe more. During this move I got rid of a lot of stuff, a lot of baggage that I have been carrying around for years and I am in the process of removing more. It feels really good as hard as it was to get in that mode to well simplify. It has been a good few years since I have done this yet this is the first time I have been as proactive about it as I have been in the last few days. I have thought long and hard about the New Year ahead and have a somewhat relaxed approach to what it means, meaning these days I am not apt to find myself trying to figure everything out anymore I just go with the flow. Some days taking it just one day at a time. I have parted the seas and made more room in my life for the good friends I neglect all to often, my studies and spending time with my family and look forward to what I have yet to learn as 2012 gets underway and sharing my journey with you every step of the way....

The World Isn't Likely to End in 2012...

There is a kind of inexplicable joy involved in spending the day void of the pressures of life, to watch your loved ones smile with amazement as they tear wrapping paper and enjoy good cooking..life somehow seems less than demanding on Christmas..it is as if everything stops and worries take a back seat and you find that happiness, that peaceful place we try all year to reach..in reflection and with just the right amount of gratitude I welcome the new year and all that lies ahead...there is nothing quite like resting your head on your pillow at night knowing you are amongst people that love you..the world is hard enough out there and if anything the holidays have made me fully appreciate what it means to be home..

“Let us toast to animal pleasures, to escapism, to rain on the roof and instant coffee, to unemployment insurance and library cards, to absinthe and good-hearted landlords, to music and warm bodies and contraceptives... and to the "good life", whatever it is and wherever it happens to be.”
― Hunter S. Thompson, The Proud Highway: Saga of a Desperate Southern Gentleman

I have my life back!!

Its a funny thing college, sometimes I feel like I am in a time warp. In any case the Fall semester is a wrap and I am back to reading and writing about things that I actually find entertaining as opposed to what can be considered obligatory. Not that I didn't enjoy my classes this semester but given the time of year the holiday madness has a way of taking hold of a person and I felt for a split second there so scattered that I didn't  know which end was up..whew. Christmas is fast approaching and I am glad we got to take some time out and see The Elves & The Shoemaker Play at The Fountain Hills Theatre and see Santa not once but twice..last weekend I baked no less than 8 dozen cookies and this weekend after throwing an epic celebration for my sons 11th birthday I will be doing cupcakes and finishing up the last of the Christmas shopping..Hoping for a smooth next couple of weeks until we move into our new home. Sometimes its just nice to reflect and and realize that when life gets hectic it is good to be busy sometimes, it is in times like these you find the true meaning of going with the flow..now if I can just sit down and watch a movie in its entirety...

Christmas 2k11



Happy Christmas!

School is over this coming up Wednesday

Then I will be back <3

Spooked

The first person to wish me a happy birthday this year was the great Jeremiah Newton it was shortly thereafter that he advised me to get my Ouija bored out of the house. Taking it in jest I found myself up late one night around Halloween watching the real story behind the movie The Exorcist , as it turns out the Ouija bored was to blame ..who knew. Mine is tucked under my TV stand and I have second thoughts about messing around with it anymore. It was just a few weeks back the boys and I were trying to summon our late dog and to think what we may have brought into the house. Speaking of evil spirits I read an article last night about one of the kids who lived in the Amityville home and the proposed hoax behind it all that has hung over his family like a dark cloud since that afternoon they picked up and left that house and all of their belongings behind some 25 years ago, it got me to wonder about the current residents. You would have to either one be a real thrill seeker or two have gotten a pretty good deal to live in that house. I for one wouldn't regardless of the sensationalism surrounding that story something real happened there, just ask the kid he'll tell ya and if all goes right he will be telling everyone else at the Sundance film festival. Maybe we can finally get the real story. Being it was one of the first books I have ever read I would be pretty interested to hear it.

Jeremiah Newton & Candy Darling

Speaking of firsts the year has been full of them and to think that it is drawing to a close brings me into reflective mode. There is no stress associated with the holidays around here, why the Christmas shopping is almost done..almost not quite. The Fall semester is over in just about a month and soon we will be celebrating two more birthdays. I have been immersed in different styles of architecture..always the historian this explains away any future fanatical posts that may come your way. I have also been hugely distracted on my new hobby of couponing and getting things for free.. I know how this sounds and it is in no way due to any outside influence from shows on TV I swear. This is something I have pretty much always have done back and forth through my years raising a family however in the past few months I have kicked it into high gear and it has resulted in quite the stockpile..I find myself longing for an extra room in my home to put shelves in so that I may keep it nicely organized. But for now I have a huge dresser full of various brands of bodywash, lotions, shampoo,makeup, toothpaste, scented candles and you name it.. don't even get me started on the lip gloss my hubs says I could open a store. It is pretty fun actually and I can even keep up with it without leaving the house by snagging some stellar online deals.. I really should share though I doubt anyone comes around here expecting to find a deal.. and besides CentsableShoppin is the go to girl for things like this.. you really should check her out you may just find yourself hitting up 4 stores in one night and coming home with hundreds of dollars in food and product for like 60 bucks.. its true this is what you can find me doing on Tuesday nights.. but enough about that. Tomorrow is Monday and I am really going to try and wake up earlier, fact is I am not much of a morning person anymore...if I can refrain from reading ghost stories tonight I may just be able to..

Outside the Comfort Zone

Most of the time I tend to roll through life thinking anything is possible if you have the will..lately I find myself going with the flow instead of making things happen and I have begun to feel well somewhat lax..Perhaps it is because there has just been so much going on and despite my effort to slow things down a bit the weeks just seem to fly by..another birthday has just passed, as did Halloween and I am going strong in the day to day that is my life...I find myself longing for the Fall semester to end yet lamenting that it means the Spring semester will come before I know it and the closer I get to graduation the harder and more time consuming the classes are...but its alright no need for complaining afterall I am fortunate to just be able to have the opportunity to finish my degree..spending my Sunday taking test however is all that it takes to put me in a funk..especially when there are sick kiddos who are relentless about playing albums all throughout the day..at least my 5 year old goes to the old Warren Zevon or Linda Rondstat.. The days have turned chilly and I volunteered to run the face painting booth at the school carnival last Friday night, something that had me full of anxiety..but it worked out well despite the downpour..at least we got three good hours where it was just windy...Halloween was a blast the boys and I rode on the back of a mini pickup truck around the neighborhood and did some trick or treating and then we did 2 church festivals in 2 days..the amount of candy that remains in my house should be illegal! Tomorrow is a new day and a good nights rest may allow me to catch up with myself..I will get back to my yoga after a 2 day hiatus ( my body aches tell me its time) I will make a few phone calls to friends and family I haven't had time to catch up with this week..I will take care of my sick little man and give him lots of love and make something comforting for dinner..a glimpse of possibility in the next day of my life that lies ahead..time to get under some heavy covers, watch something on tv that I want to see and call it a night.....